Oboe Life: Take 2 – Surveyers and Out-Going Christians

I’m not sure how I feel about people who blatantly ask questions for the purpose of making you uncomfortable in the end. Okay okay…so it wasn’t their intentions and they did seem like really nice people after all, but you could tell (I mean if you were there) that they were making us uncomfortable with their questions about abortion.

So let me back up here. The other day (yesterday? I don’t know) my boyfriend and I invited a couple of friends to hang out with us at Balboa Park for Free Tuesday Museums (if you live in San Diego and don’t know about this, you’ve been living under a rock). We went through 2 Museums already and wanted to go see if we could get a snack first before heading to the Japanese Friendship Garden. So, while the boys went to the Botanical Garden (my boyfriend’s a sucker for caterpillars on the plants), a friend stayed with me, and we wandered around aimlessly by this hot dog stand (which was a bit pricey). For a couple of short asian girls, who looked like we had nothing else better to do with our lives at that moment, it seemed like we were asking for any form of entertainment.

Well, it must’ve been the case because this white, teenaged couple came towards us all of a sudden with a clipboard in their hand. I noticed them before when we exited the Museum of Art a few moments ago; they looked like they were trying to eyeball the right people to survey that day. Anyway, I knew they were gonna ask us questions, and in my head I was like “what the heck, we have time to waste”, so I said “sure, we have time to answer a few questions”. I wish I never said sure because the first question they asked was “do you feel like abortion is okay?”. Oh boy.

I’m not one to express my opinions about political issues, especially ones that are spotlighted by the media, so this was going to be very uncomfortable. I answered the first few questions only because they were easy yes-or-no answers, but I dropped after my friend quickly said no to “do you feel abortion is okay if the mother was raped?”. This gave the girl a startle, so she asked why my friend answered “no” so quickly, and my friend gave her an answer that maybe some girls had planned their whole life ahead with big things, and this one idiot comes along and rapes her and ruins her dreams, so abortion should be a choice. At this point, I’m thinking that it’s not very ethical to ask why a person answered the way they did, and me and my friend are already uncomfortable as it is. Even though I gave up answering questions, my friend continued, but she struggled to find words or which side to think about.

It’s hard in general to decide what’s the correct side in the abortion issue, and it has to take research and patience and personal beliefs to decide what side you’re on. So, at the end of their survey, they ask if it’s okay if they can tell us why they’re Pro-Life, and I’m like oh-no because I know we’re going to be preached about it. They confessed they were Christians and that God made us for a reason. Personally, I had my fights with God and the church I grew up with, so I wasn’t pleased at all. I didn’t say anything of course, but it was super obvious that we were uncomfortable and wanted to walk away as soon as we could to get out of the situation. My friend and I talked a little about what just happened when we waited for the others to meet back with us, and we found it quite difficult to actually pick a side.

Personally, after going through that survey and researching and knowing life, I realize that I’m on the side of Pro-choice. I do believe there are aspects of Pro-life that are good that we should let the child live, and if we don’t want it that adoption is an option, but the U.S. adoption process is hard and difficult because it’s a bureaucracy that is not funded well enough to treat foster children fairly or to get children adopted faster. I read a post from Humans of New York on Facebook, which described a woman’s struggle with the adoption process of the U.S. Not only that, my friend gave a good reason that rape is such a tragic and emotionally heartbreaking event that is not planned in our life. Either side has pros and cons, but it can all be decided with different people who don’t have the same experience. I appreciate, despite my annoyance, what those people were trying to do, but I have decided otherwise. (Please don’t throw comments here and there, I’ll respect your opinions).

At the end of the day, I had a pretty good day. I actually didn’t realize there was this extra part of the Japanese Friendship Garden where it goes to this koi pond at the bottom of this hill, so I was pleased to see it. Not to mention seeing this kid asleep on this rock right next to the pond. Although I hoped he didn’t get hurt, I also hoped someone pushed him in.


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